God can be trusted

The last six months have turned my life upside down, like nothing else. A few of my worst dreams have come true: 1) not knowing what to do next in life, 2) having to be separated by an ocean from some of my best friends and "children," and 3) my mom being diagnosed with stage 4 cancer (you can read her story here). I've had to battle temptations more head-on than ever before, go through some measure of reverse culture shock, and wonder what on earth my purpose in life is anymore. But God is good; He has continued to direct and guide me, even if only in the tiniest of increments at times. As I look back over the last half of 2015 and these first few weeks of the new year, I can clearly see His faithfulness (exhibit A being that my first worst dream was a key lifesaver when the third worst dream happened). My problems don't all appear to be solved now, but I know God can be trusted to carry out His perfect purpose. I am so thankful for Him and the incredible power He gives!

I discovered this song sometime this week, and it's been such an encouragement to me. I thought I'd share it with you...

This Trial

Verse 1
When your faith is running low, and you just can't seem to figure it out,
You know you should keep walking, but you just don't see how.
Don't doubt in the dark what He's said in the light -
He's still the same God in the day or the night!

Verse 2
When your life's a question mark, and your answers are coming out wrong,
You know that God is working, but it just seems so long,
Don't give up on God when He's working on you!
It's Jesus the Son that He's forming in you!

Chorus
This trial won't define you; it will only refine you.
You know there's a plan, though you don't see it now.
Your God will not forget you; He'll eventually direct you.
So don't be afraid because you can know:
Your heart may be wounded, all your plans adjusted, your faith may be tested,
But God can be trusted.

Bridge
Finish the course God has laid at your feet.
Never give less than your best!
Pour out your heart, take one day at a time;
God will do the rest!

(C) 2011 Ben Everson Music - www.beneverson.com

One year

Pathfinder outing! (Photo: Shannon Maddocks)

The school year is nearly over! It's so hard for to believe. A group of student teachers from Avondale College have been here for the past three weeks, but they just finished teaching their last day, and will be leaving soon. There's one "normal" week of study, then we have review and final exams in the following two weeks. Didn't I just arrive here at Wat Preah Yesu? It's crazy how fast time has gone by.

During the course of this year, my students and I have grown quite close. We've been with each other through happy times and hard times, 19+ classes a week. It's been fascinating to watch each young character closely and see the strengths blossom. I've seen so many weaknesses in myself, but I've also observed so much strength in God. It's been an incredible opportunity to be pushed toward Him as in no other way, and chosen to be a channel of His power and love.

We were really blessed during this school year to have a large variety of volunteers. A fellow teacher wrote about them here, on her blog. So many strong skills were represented this year: science, music, agriculture, photography, theology, health & nursing, accounting, math, and other things. God has provided just what we need to teach the kids.

Now we are looking ahead to next school year. We know that even though several of our teachers are moving on to new places, God will continue to give us the resources we need. However, at this point in time, we're still on the lookout for volunteers for the new school year beginning in September. Specifically, we need people to teach the following:

• Mechanics
• Bible
• English
• Science
• Math
• Music

We can use people with other skills as well. You don’t have to be a qualified teacher, but we do prefer conservative Seventh-day Adventists who have a commitment to letting Christ live His life through them.
If you are interested or would like to know more, please contact Tim Maddocks at tim @ saltmin . org (no spaces).

I'm so glad that God has worked it out so I can stay an additional year. One of my students mentioned that he wants me to stay for seven years. I said that it's up to God - He has to provide for me to stay if that's what He wants! So my little guy is now praying that God will help me to stay for that long. :-)

I will visit the US from August 14 - September 2. I am looking forward to being home again, trying out American food (not sure how I'll cope without rice), and visiting friends. I hope to see you, give you an update in person, and just catch up on life!

P.S. My friend Kathleen is much more faithful at updating her blog than I am, and she shares much of what happens at Wat Preah Yesu. You might consider following her blog as well - Purposed in My Heart.

I wasn't counting on...

When I left Inchy, I had hopes and dreams of new things ahead. I still do (I leave Friday for AFM's summer mission training)! However, I've already been surprised with several unexpected things:

Dusting off my violin. I've really enjoyed playing it again this summer, thanks to a friend who inspired me to get practiced up so we could play duets. Although, this may be the last week that I'll actually have time to practice for a while! Even though I still have a long way to go, two months of practice has done a lot of good.

Missing a second church family. Leaving Inchy-town was a sad event, and I miss a lot of people there. However, what I didn't expect was having to say goodbye to another group of special people here in WW! From earning new little-kid hugs, to playing violin/cello duets, to sharing Sunday breakfasts with friends, to playing many active games of Cones... I've had lots of special times with lots of wonderful people who are becoming fast friends. I'll miss them just as much as my Inchy family.

Not reading any books through. Seriously? What happened to all of the time I thought I'd have? Somehow my bookshelf is untouched... I've pulled one or two volumes off every now and then, but nothing's gotten read all the way through. Oops! That's one thing I need to make sure I figure out how to do.

Learning how to take care of chickens. I should have known! My brother is an animal-lover, and he has his own crew of chickens in the back yard. I've been duly taught how to take care of them in the mornings and evenings for when he's not around. Lessons learned, mistakes made... I'm well on my way to becoming a chicken farmer. Sort of.

Time flying so fast. It seems like I just arrived here with my Tahoe-load of earthly possessions. Two months, gone already?? I have a feeling that the coming year will speed right by...

Many other things... I've learned a lot that wasn't in the plan. Isn't that true of all paths of life? This all reminds me of a quote that has spoken to me many times:

A life of monotony is not the most conducive to spiritual growth. Some can reach the highest standard of spirituality only through the breaking up of the regular order of things.... God desires human beings to be more closely associated with Him. Therefore He takes them away from their friends and acquaintances. When God was preparing Elijah for translation, He moved him from place to place, that he might leave behind the methods and customs he had previously followed, that he might not settle down on his lees, and thus fail of obtaining moral greatness and spiritual soundness.*

I want the stuff I can't count on to shape me into the flexible and yet grounded person God wants me to be!

*The Upward Look, page 170. Emphasis provided by me.

The journey begins

And... I'm on my way. It's already been nearly three weeks since I left home and returned to Walla Walla. Home is here, too, but I left a part of my heart behind me. I'm loving the new experiences and spending so much time with my family, but I will never ever forget the family I have in Inchy. Leaving home is easier said than done!

Forever family (Photo: Schane Johnson)

Love these people! (Photo: Schane Johnson)

My first week at home, I got to live with a bunch of guys. My mom wasn't home yet from a trip to Colorado, so I got to relieve the bachelors of KP duty and cleaning the house. They constructed a room for me in the family room out of bookcases and my dresser and bed, and after I got around to putting all of my unneeded earthly possessions in another corner, it turned out to be quite cozy. I have the best view in the house, too!

My mom finally returned, and so we all enjoy having our family back together again. She and I have been spending some time outside in the garden, planting and weeding and setting up hoses and sprinklers. The garden out back is actually made up of eight large plots, and four we share with other families. It's neat to get to know more people just through having them in our back yard on occasion!

I've already been quite involved with the youth group here. There are so many youth here (it's a multi-college town, after all!) and it is special to spend more time getting to know each of them rather than just the general hi-and-bye that happened when I used to come for a weekend visit. Since my family lives in town, people drop by quite often and so life is never boring!

Last weekend was the Pathfinder Fair - which was basically in my backyard. Very cool! I was gone all day Sabbath but on Sunday I headed over to the academy and got to see several of the old-timer directors and district coordinators. The kids are all different, but it's so special to me to see those dedicated leaders still all about kids. It's their life, and they aren't stopping anytime soon. They have such a huge influence and impact in those kids' lives. It made me remember just how much I love Pathfinders! My main goal of visiting was to watch the drill teams do their performance, so I joined the crowd. Drilling and marching is one of my very favorite parts of Pathfinders and I used to call commands for a few teams way back when. And... certain people in this conference know that, hehe. So, when they turned up short on judges, they spotted me and asked me to judge. Yay! I got to have an eagle eye on those kids' performance, and I really enjoyed it. Many teams did quite well!

As for mission plans, those are coming together well. Last week I got my ticket to Cambodia! It definitely seems more final now. I will be leaving on Sunday, August 25. This week, I was also officially accepted into AFM's missionary training program, and so I'm looking forward to that! That will begin July 15 and go until August 10. Things are happening and I am excited to see what God has in store!

Day-to-day life is different for sure. I've gone running in the mornings with Joey several times and have walked 4-5 miles a couple times now in the evenings. The road by our house is so beautiful out towards the wheat fields! I've also worked in the garden, helped my grandpa prepare his family history book for publishing, practiced my violin, and done some long-distance proofreading for YD. Life is simple and yet there's still plenty that goes on!

Here are a few pictures of recent happenings:

Balloon stampede - the balloons took off behind our house!

Kenny headed out to the Pathfinder Fair on Sabbath morning

Little onions, part of a bigger onion plant!

Sunshine on an evening walk

Kenny's babies (my charges while he's gone camping)!

When dreams come true

It's always been my dream...

I remember singing about the missionary plane in kindergarten, reading Norma Youngberg books at night by flashlight as an eight-year-old, and going on two life-changing mission trips to the Philippines when I was seventeen and nineteen. Watching mission videos, hearing missionaries speak, seeing the need of people around the world...

And now, my dream has nearly come true. I get to be a foreign missionary.

To which country? That in itself has been a journey. I had plans; God's differed. But He has led, closed and opened doors, given advice through the voices of friends and family, and now I'm making plans to go teach at a school in Cambodia at the end of August.

My friends Sarah and Laura went to teach at Wat Preah Yesu, a children's orphanage and school, a couple of years ago. I kept up with them a little as they went over and wrote of their experiences teaching there at school. Little did I know that I would get to live similar adventures later down the road!

Another wonderful opportunity has been placed across my path as well - a month-long summer missionary training program with AFM (even though I won't be a missionary with them). And so (pending my acceptance there, at this point) I plan to travel to Michigan in July to learn from experts in the field before I begin my overseas journey. I am really looking forward to it!

It is a sad thing to leave my station at Young Disciple, but I believe that the challenges and opportunities ahead are God-led. The past six years have been amazing and full of lessons, miracles, and forever friends, and I am excited to see what God has in store for this new chapter of life.

I will share more later about Cambodia and other details of life. Stay posted!

P.S. I currently sponsor a young girl at an orphanage in Myanmar, but due to the expenses of my upcoming trip, I will no longer be able to support her. Would you consider "adopting" her as your own? If God places this on your heart, please let me know and I can give you more information. :-)

Mission in the moment

The big picture is important, but individual moments are what counts:

The Mission in the Moment (Jeffrey Dean) from gotandem on Vimeo.

Thinking back on yesterday

Funny how a month and day can seem completely normal and mundane to one person, and yet hold year-to-year meaning for another...

It's amazing just how much can occur in the time frame of just one revolution around the sun. And yet, if today is in the context of just yesterday, or the day before, I don't see much change. I have to flip the pages of my journal all the way back to February 24 of last year and see just what has been recorded since then.

The question is posed again: Am I any different than I was last year? My journal reminds me that the answer is yes. Absolutely yes. Lessons learned, challenges embarked on, new burdens placed on my heart, all morph to change the very core of this body and mind that is me.

God has changed me. It's not the end of the journey by any means, but I am encouraged to see His working so clearly.

This year's goal: surrender. To know Him more, so fully that nothing can separate. To be able to read my journal a year from now and see once again that God has molded me to be an even closer resemblance to His beautiful character of love.

Discovery of the year

Hello to the new year! Somehow I sense that this year is just going to be the very best ever. I have been inspired and changed by GYC, and I want to carry its principles home with me. I want to work more than ever for God's service. I want my church to be revived. I want prayer to be a huge part of my life. I want to do all I can to reach souls for Jesus. But there's something different than I've had before. Something that's somehow been overlooked, even though it's stood right in front of me for as long as I have known. A requirement that precedes all priorities and desires to do right:

I must constantly be in contact with Jesus and filled with the Holy Spirit's power.

Last year I tried to do all I could to be of service to God. But that's just what happened--it was all that I could do, which isn't worth anything at all! By the end of last year (2011), I was so tired out from everything I was trying to do that I just couldn't grow any more. But I've made the above discovery that was an obvious one. A "duh" moment...

There is NO WAY that I can do any of the things God wants me to do without His strength, and without being filled with His Holy Spirit. I've been a fool to even attempt those things!

This year, 2012, I want to rethink my plans. Over the past week, I have been evaluating the last year and deciding what needs to change. But even now, I'm not so sure that those plans are what God would have me do every day. I pray that as I decide on my goals and aims, the Lord will shape me to be more like Him.

I want to reach my home town. I want to do my utmost best at work. I want my church to experience true revival. I want to entrust my future to my Creator.

And how is this to be done?

Only through the divine strength of the Holy Spirit. Through quality time spent before His throne, in prayer and study of His Word.

A happy new year to you!

Be still, my soul.

Why fear? Why worry? He created the worlds; He is more than able to create a new heart in me.


Be still, my soul; the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul; thy best, thy heavenly, Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.

Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

Be still, my soul; the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord,
When disappointment, grief, and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love's purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul; when change and tears are past,
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last.