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Thursday, February 2, 2012

Do I mean it?

My eyes fly open. It's time.

I reach for my phone to see what the numbers say…

1:01 AM.

I sigh. Lord, surely You don't mean NOW. I know I told You anytime was fine, but ONE? That's just too much…

I get up, use the restroom, my mind confused. Now what do I do? I told Him I would trust Him… but I can't get (and stay) up now!

I climb onto my bed. Maybe if I go back to sleep, He'll wake me up again at 3 AM. That just sounds way better than one…

Then the thought strikes me: He wants to see if I really mean it.

Do I? Were last night's words genuine or just play?

"Lord, wake me up whenever You want me to. You know how much time I really need to spend with You, so I give you permission to wake me up tomorrow morning. (Only, maybe not at 2? I'll trust what You decide, but it would sure be nice to not be then…)"

A decision must be made.

Do I mean it?

Of course I mean it. But I need a special measure of grace to actually get up…

And He gives it.

Five hours of time with God! What greater blessing?

"The Lord GOD . . . He wakeneth morning by morning, He wakeneth mine ear to hear as the learned" (Isaiah 50:4).

5 comments:

  1. I was given a very similar opportunity this morning, and I rolled over and went back to sleep. What potential that could have had! I'm convicted....this must not happen again!

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  2. Oh! Thank you for posting that, Emily. I've prayed similar prayers more than once lately, but I haven't followed through. After all, don't our parents teach us all that nighttime is for sleeping? But next time, but God's grace, I'll take the opportunity. :-)

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  3. Thanks for sharing, Challenged to trust Him.

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  4. This makes me think of a similar experience I had at GYC when I was quite exhausted. God rewarded me doubly for the time I spent with Him, and I was so much better off with that quality time communing with Him. God is so good!

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